163: because sharing your struggle doesn’t make you brave

Calm the fuck down; it doesn’t make you weak, either.

There is true, deep value in finding a community—hell, even a single person—who gets it. Who gets it. Who gets it. Who can look you in the eyes and say You are not alone, Friend.

And yeah, you have to share your story for them to say that.

But that’s not what makes you brave.

You are brave when you are honest with yourself about where you are, right here, right now.

You are brave when you tell just one best friend over coffee or phone or shaky letter. (Hell, I think you’re brave for even considering telling someone.)

You are brave every time you cry. Or start over. Or spend the day in bed watching TV.

You are brave because you are choosing to stay.

World Mental Health Day is important. National Suicide Prevention Week is important. Removing the stigma is important. Understanding the facts is important. Having conversations about hard, emotional topics in a safe, constructive setting is important.

And for some people, sharing their journey online is important.

But it’s OK if you don’t want to share yours.

You don’t have to share your story to deserve treatment.

You don’t have to share your story to validate your illness.

You don’t have to share your story to receive love.

PS: I really do hope you share it, with someone. A friend, a therapist, an anonymous hotline worker. Being sick is cold, dark isolation, and people really can help. You just don’t have to share it online (if you don’t want to).

PPS: If you or someone you know is struggling with their mental health, call the Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255, or check out To Write Love On Her Arms (TWLOHA), where you’ll find a community of honest people who made the brave decision to stay. Because their stories matter – and so does yours.